The first time you met Nirmali, it was a chance meeting. No doctors being available on Sunday, you literally begged her to check up on your sick friend. While discussing how your friend fell sick in the first place, you told her about the meat club you had formed with your friends, where the primary rule was to eat fresh meat that was cooked the right way. You also told her about your research project which revolved around different meat-eating habits in the north-east, and she asked you to bring her a dish specially cooked by you. That's how it all began, that's how you were led into this passionate ride with her with no passage of return.
Your bonding with Nirmali grew beautifully, despite the considerable difference in both of your lives. She - a middle-aged married paediatrician, you - a young PhD scholar with a zeal for life. Both of you went on several meat-eating endeavours; starting from mutton, wild rabbits to foul smelling insects. You were habituated to consuming such exotic meats, but Nirmali wasn't. It was probably the only adventurous thing she had done in years. With a school-going kid at home and a dedicated doctor husband staying away from home for most of the time, she was suffocating in her own breath until you came along, with a whiff of fresh air that smelled like raw love and well-cooked meat.
Both of you could feel your hearts yearning to hear the other's beats, yet the societal shackles kept your desires suppressed. When Nirmali's lips craved for your touch, she kissed her husband as passionately as she felt for you. And you figured out a way to be able to immerse yourself in her without really touching her. Crazy as it sounds, but isn't that how love in its most vulnerable form supposed to be?
You didn't realise what you were getting into when you asked Elias Da to cut a chunk of meat from your thigh for the first time. For him, it was just another experiment you wanted to do, to aid your research.
For you, it was the only way for you to be able to get inside your lover's body without jumping on a bed with her. That's exactly what you had said, right? I could never forget the look on your face when you uttered those words. It shone with sheer love, and my poor heart was sold.
When Nirmali tasted you for the first time, she experienced a state of ecstasy, something that was completely alien to her and yet a single feed was enough to get her addicted to that state of being high on love. Knowing that it was you who she consumed, didn't deter her from craving for more and more of human flesh. You obliged, like an obedient lover, and the smile that you carried on your face, for being able to please her, was unforgettable. It's still fresh in my mind.
You became a fool in love, just as any of us do, but you know when I started rooting for you? Seeing you puke when Nirmali showed you the bandage on her leg as an answer to what meat she had cooked for you. For you, it was never about meat, it was never about anything other than Nirmali. All you did was love her unconditionally, with all her flaws. For you, meat was a metaphor for love, the only way you could come up with to become one with your lover. But for Nirmali, that love transcended to gluttony - a deadly sin. Punishment was inevitable.
My heart ached for you when you were ready to take someone's life for her, to fulfil her growing greed for human meat. When you got caught, and your chats with Nirmali were found, your love story made headlines. For the world, you were just a cannibalistic couple, clearly out of their mind. They degraded the purity of your emotions into mere meat, I can't imagine how hurtful it must have been. But you probably didn't give a damn about any of this as long as she was by your side. How could you, when this tragic ending to your story only brought her closer, giving her the courage to hold your hand infront of the whole world? When I witnessed her slipping a hand onto yours, chills ran down my spine. In that moment, Nirmali finally named her yours. I was left with happy tears, a hollow heart but a heavy mind.
I have no idea how things went for both of you afterwards. I can only guess, it got real ugly. You deserved a better end, Sumon. So did Nirmali. But maybe this was how your love story was destined to be. Criminal, yet complete.
With love,
Another hopeless lover.
© Chandamita
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